Brevity or the lack of it

I have always believed that as a wannabe writer/author, my biggest weakness is my inability to be coherent - dexterous, , lucid, whatever. Damn I can't even do that when talking about it, if you know what I mean. I especially hem and haw when facing larger crowds in a formal setting. So naturally, when asked to attend a session by one of my favorite authors, I jumped at the opportunity. Mainly, to hear her speak and learn a thing  or two about brevity.

Do you know what it feels like when after craving for a chocolate, you bite into a Lindt dark chocolate with 85% cocoa? Well, if you don't, find out. For that is how I felt when I heard Jhumpa Lahiri read out passages from her new unfinished book and later answer audience questions. Disappointed. Just how I felt after I first met the editor of my favorite youth magazine, back in the days. Subsequently, I worked with this woman for 2 months on her new book, but the charm did not disissipate slowly. It went away poof! in one quick motion, in the first few minutes that she first interviewed me for the job.

I digress. Back to Lahiri's reading. Not only could she not articulate her thoughts well and she umm'd and err'd a lot, her tone was very deadbeat. She could use her striking appearance to her advantage to create a stronger positive impression, but obviously doesn't seem to have bothered.

Maybe my expectations were set too naturally high. Or it could simply be that the audience wasn't stimulating enough. High chance it was the latter. Here's some example of the kind of questions the audience asked her:

Sample Audience Question I: "You had a thick accent when you began reading. Why did it disappear mid-way? Were you trying to create an American atmosphere"
Lahiri's Response: "I'm born and raised in America. Whatever accent I have is part of my natural communication"

Sample Audience Question/Comment II: "8 years ago I ran into a woman in Kolkotta. Her last name was Lahiri. Today I realized she was your cousin Subbalaxmi Lahiri" (or something like that. I was laughing too hard to understand what exactly the woman said)
Lahiri's response: "Small world"

Its not that I suddenly dislike her for not being a great orator. She is a writer and great at that. Its only that she makes me feel like anyone can be like her. I can be like her. And I dislike thinking this way. I want my idols to be that way. Idols. Awe-inspiring. Jaw-dropping. Too much to ask for I guess.

Meanwhile, I'm just going to ignore the fact that I heard her speak in such a boring way and gloat a little more at the fact that I managed to get her to sign my copy of her book.

Fall No More

Window-sill, Home, Manhattan

The first snowfall in NYC.

My first snowfall.

My first snow experience.

The first of many to come. 

Now excuse me as I continue to go a little silly,

for

"When I no longer thrill to the first snow of the season, I'll know I'm growing old"

~Lady Bird Johnson

New-York Pizza, really?

Luzzo's Pizza, Easy Village, Manhattan

For all my ranting about the unhealthy food habits of the people in this country, I have to admit that if there’s one thing that will make me never want to leave New York, it’s the New York pizza! Look at the picture above, look me in the eyes and tell me you would disagree. Guilty! 

Deep-Fried WHAT?!!

Led Zappole, Manhattan
Interesting name of the place itself, will plan a visit here when I drop say, 20 kilos. (think: never)

What do you do when you are given an oreo cookie? You eat it.

What do you do when you are given a snickers bar? You feel a little guilty, and then eat it.

What do you do when you are given a slice of pizza? You ponder, feel guilty, and then eat it.

What does an American do when they are given any of the above? Deep-fry them!

This is it. I have concluded that Americans will eat anything. Anything that is fried and deep-fried and covered in oil-and-grease or sugar! Let me re-phrase. Not only will they eat anything that is fried, they will find a new thing each day that can possibly be fried and then deep-fry it till it doesn’t even resemble the original product.

Whoever thinks of frying Oreo cookies? Snickers? Pizza, for heaven’s sake?! 400 calories a slice ain’t good enough for you? Let’s dunk it in oil and make it a round 1000!

I think my arteries clogged up just by looking at the sign-board above. Now excuse me while I write to the Association of Diabetes Specialists or whatever organization it was that named India is the Diabetes Capital of the World. 

Look, Willy Wonka is for real!

Max Brenner - Chocolate by the Bald Man, Manhattan

Coffee makes it possible to get out of bed, but chocolate makes it worthwhile ~ Anon

Do you know what Charlie felt like in Willy Wonka's factory? No? Well, i'll tell you what Charlie felt like Willy Wonka's factory! Do you know what it feels like to suddenly wake up one day and be told that an alternate world exists? That the world you lived in was just a cheap substitute where mortals are banished from finding out about all that is good and beautiful and utopia-like. No? Well, then you shouldn't be spending any more time reading this than you have and instead start plotting your way to visit Max Brenner as soon as possible, for it is the closest you'll get to Willy Wonka's chocolate factory as possible!

Oh of course, you're still reading! So i'll just sum up my visit to Max Brenner in a few individual words instead of stringing together sentences. And it's not because I'm too bored to write (really!), it's only because I don't think I can talk about an experience like Brenner in just a few lines, and partly also because I think these words will do the job that any other style of writing would.

Think of: chocolate, coffee, rains, warmth, winter, cozy, gooey, fondue, sweet, candy, melting, waffles, marshmallow, romance, music, cheese, caramel, cookies, sugar, crepes, hazelnut, vanilla, mocha. What, are you drooling already? There's a lot more. So now go visit.

PS. Did I mention that they have the most adorable mugs? Hug mug for some warmth, kangaroo cup for the un-deciders like me (coffee? chocolate? coffee? No both!)!